


Obeisance

by DuskyMafiosa



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, Feels Wreck, Low Self-Worth, PearlRoseBomb, You can guess who.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-31
Updated: 2015-08-31
Packaged: 2018-04-18 05:12:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4693328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DuskyMafiosa/pseuds/DuskyMafiosa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As your commander, she didn't want you to die. As your friend, she didn't want to see you hurting yourself “like this.” As your lover, she couldn't bear to see the depths of your devotion. It isn't so much that she didn't tell you these things, you just refused to listen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Obeisance

**Author's Note:**

> Pearlrosebomb ends Monday, so this is the best I could do in one hour. Many thanks goes to AshleyXIV for being my late-night beta! Also, I fully admit to using this ship as a vehicle for my sad, gay headcanons.

One war, and you're left ragged. Beaten until you can do nothing but retreat or heal, whichever comes first. Every time you return, each fight reminds you that the battlefield is no place for a Pearl.

_I'm not strong enough._

That didn't stop you, though. Technically, the order was given only once and never again after you were hurt the first time. But you saw the look on her face; when gems were destroyed, innocent humans were murdered, and territories were captured, each loss etched a worry line deeper into her countenance. Figuratively, of course, but you kept count of all the lives lost and swore to continue fighting in their names.

As your commander, she didn't want you to die. As your friend, she didn't want to see you hurting yourself “like this.” As your lover, she couldn't bear to see the depths of your devotion. It isn't so much that she didn't tell you these things, you just refused to listen.

_I'll do it for her._

She wanted you to stay back, to help from the camp, but that just wouldn't do. If ever there was a time to prove your worth as a gem, your worth as an asset, it was now. By her side, or more accurately, between her and every enemy.

A victory was a confirmation. If it weren't possible for a Pearl to come this far, you wouldn't have. It's that simple, you told yourself until you believed it. Who could've thought these wars for Earth would come to an end with the aid of a Pearl?

_Why would I ever want to go home if you're here?_

Your left hand's gone, the illusionary limb disappearing as soon as it's severed, but that's not a problem. You strike with the sword in your right. As long as you can have one more win in your name, the damage to you is inconsequential, barely worth mentioning. But you know she'll mention it, you know she'll worry. And as you wipe away her tears each night, you can't offer any better attempt at comfort than a proud “We won.”

“Pearl,” she says, “It's not that _we won_ , it's what _you've lost._ Why can't you see that? _This isn't what I want!_ ”

Confused by her logic, you reply “What you want is to protect Earth, correct? That is what I'm doing.” Rose shakes her head, her massive hair unfurling only slightly. “But you're destroying more of yourself than of the Homeworld Army. Why would you think I approve of this?”

The answer comes naturally. “I am, by design, of lesser value than the others. Therefore, my destruction won't impact the overall effort as much as my victories will.”

She weeps again, you attempt to comfort her again, both of you wondering how the other is so blind.

**Author's Note:**

> How about that? Any comments, suggestions? I look forward to seeing them!


End file.
